Eric..

I had a dream about my friend, Eric, last night.  I don't know where we were, but we were in a very crowded place, and I suddenly saw Eric across the room, sitting beside his mother, and my heart leaped.  I began running across the room to hug him, but I lost sight of him, and then he was gone.

Eric was one of my very best friends.   His parents were like my parents, and mine were like his.  When we met, he was 12 and I was 14, and I, of course, thought he was just a kid.  I don't remember when Eric first gave me 'zingers' (like butterflies in your stomach, only more like fireworks), but one day he did.  And no boy before or since has given me zingers like the ones that Eric gave me!  By the time that happened, though, Eric and I had begun to think of each other as a brother and sister.  We did go out on a real date once, but when we kissed each other goodnight, we both began to laugh, and Eric made some sarcastic remark about incest.  His sense of humor was just one of the things I so loved about him. 

I also loved Eric's wisdom and depth.  Though he was a full year and 364 days younger than me, I always thought of him as an older brother, rather than a younger one....at least after I had stopped thinking of him as a kid!  His perspective, to me, always seemed so beyond our years, and I remember wondering then how he could possibly know so much about life.

Today would be Eric's 48th birthday, but 22 years ago this past May, a car wreck took Eric away much too soon.  Just as Eric's life had a profound affect upon mine, his death impacted me as nothing had before, leaving a very large hole in my heart.  I never could have dreamed that, in his leaving, Eric was preparing me for  something unimaginable.  Though Chad was, at that time, a mere wish in my heart, without my conscious knowledge, God was using Eric's life and death to teach me to deal with events that wouldn't occur until 20 years later.  I don't remember the exact date of Eric's passing, for the date that he entered this world seems much more important than the date that he left it, but I know that it was very nearly 20 years to the date  from the day that Chad left us.  Who could have known that as I was watching the faith and the grace that Eric's parents displayed during those terrible days, they were teaching me how to endure the death of my own unborn son?  Though they were  already like a second set of parents to me, having learned those important lessons from them has cemented that bond.

More than once during his life, I told Chad that I truly believed that he was channeling my friend Eric, because their senses of humor were so similar...and, hearing me make that statement would make both of them roll their eyes and say that I'm being dramatic.  But it is true that there were many similarities.  Chad, too, seemed to know more about life than I would have expected him to know at a young age.  Perhaps when one's life is destined to be so short, God implants an extraordinary amount of wisdom.

 Knowing that Eric and Chad...the two boys that I've loved most...have finally met gives me peace.  I imagine that Eric is teaching Chad to like baseball, and Chad is teaching Eric to like soccer, and I know for certain that they've become great friends.

I sure wish that, in my dream, I'd made it across that room to hug Eric...his hugs were some of the best ones!

Happy birthday, Eric....I sure do miss you!

Julie